F**ked up things your friends say.

[ron10]

I'm sure we all have that friend who is just a little out there. The one that talks about some inappropriate things regarding their sex life while in the midst of others.

I was at a party last night hosted by my friend Mitch. A normal game night party; lots of beer, hot girls and lots of food that is so unhealthy that it comes with an emergency room discount coupon.

So we all had about 3 beers, and Mitch started to get a little weird. Started talking about the proper way to mail your dick to africa, a hilarious experience with a stripper that was unbeknown to him a tranny, et cetera. And somehow he started talking about his sex life. It wasn't too awkward at first, well until he got into the subject of masturbation.

That's when he began to tell us of a experience he had with his girl one night. His story seemed ravishingly strange, and seemed like he was making it up as he went along.
Then he got to this part where he was asking us what we like to do before we cum. All of us tried changing the subject, but this son of a bitch was adamant. He wanted to talk about this for some weird reason.

So we sat down in this weird that 70s show style circle. And each one of us began to tell our masturbation practices. (keep in mind we were hammered by now, at least 30 empty beers lay on the table. there was 6 of us.)

And everyone tried to compose themselves and not laugh at the hilariously fucked up things that were said. But once it got to Mitch we all got really quiet. Come on, this is the Motherfucker that is basically jizzing in his pants because he wants to tell us something.
So he begins to tell us his practices. It all seems normal until the part where he cums. I swear to god that this is what he said, I know for a fact because I pulled out my flip cam and started recording it.

"Mitch: So I like to have my girl grip my balls, and shove a feather up my nose. And have her keep tickling my nose and squeezing my balls until I start sneezing. Then I have her jerk me while I'm sneezing. That is the hardest fucking Orgasm you will ever experience! You will literally cum a gallon!"

A look of awe and disgust fell over the party, as Mitch pulls down his pants and asks his girl to demonstrate.


So tell me a story of one of your fucked up friends. I think we would all ike to share a nice little perverted laugh. hah

I guarantee you that is not made up. I just have some really fucked up friends. lol